I always enjoy it when people find new thing to green-obsess about. As someone whose first ever freelance article was about the greenest way to have sex*, the pointlessness of it just amuses me. I mean, who cares about the destruction of a footballpitchsworth of rainforest every minute, when you can worry instead about the greenest way to pop your clogs?

Well done to Ecocoach though for raising this key issue. And to be fair, as they say, 50m of us do it every year, and it all mounts up.

*Interested? Get off the pill, it turns fishes transexual. And condoms won’t decompose in water unless they’re made out of lambs instead of latex.